My Essay Blog

There is all the hype these days about the Law of Attraction and the process of manifesting your desires into your life. Basically the key to this law is that you will manifest whatever you desire. There are several contingencies that come into play when you want to manifest your desire. First you must be very clear about what you want. Your desire should be written out, for in writing it you will be able to be more specific and as you write you will get more clarity. If for instance you desire a lot of money or a certain car, you much be clear on how much money or what type of car, color and include as many details as possible. It’s like a target, you need to know what you are aiming your attention towards. You must also make sure that you know the feeling of what your desire will bring you. It is in the feeling, the emotional feeling that will assist you to work with the universe to attract or manifest what you want. This is also important because if you do not know how you will feel when you receive the car or the relationship you may get what your desire but still be unhappy. The feeling is very important for it is that energy that attracts your desire through the universe.

The other element that plays a major role in attracting your desire is your belief. We have beliefs based upon experiences in our lives. We experience an event, we perceive what happens and then we come up with an explanation of what the event means. Two people can witness the same event and had two totally different experiences of what happened based on their perception. Usually the event carries along with it an emotional feeling. This emotional feeling sets the belief within our being at a cellular level.

We have so many beliefs, some that serve us and other that do not. The thing about beliefs is that many are unconscious habits of doing and thinking which operate on a sub-conscious level. If your beliefs, either conscious or unconscious, do not align with your desires, chances are that you will not attract what you desire or you will have to work much harder at getting what you desire.

The final step in manifesting your desire is to let go. Yes, let go of the emotional connect to what you desire and let the universe deliver it to you. This is a tricky part. Because it has been said “ask and it is given” you expect this to happen right away. If you don’t see what you have asked for right away you may doubt that it will work. Many times our desires show up when we get busy working on other things in our lives and take our minds off that desire for a short period of time. When we do this our desires magically shows up in our lives.

As stated in Quantum Physics, as you observe something that which you observe will react to your observation. So if you are watching and holding onto what you desire too strongly it may prevent that from manifesting into your life.

So in conclusion the Law of Attraction goes like this. First you ask for that which you desire and get clear. Second the universe will do its magic to deliver it to you and thirdly you must let go and allow yourself to receive it. The Law of Attraction or the manifestation process is a law that works all the time whether for the good or bad, so watch your thoughts and feeling and make sure you let go and receive.

In a culture full of reasons to say “no,” it takes a lot of courage to find ways to say “yes.”

We’re taught to say “no” from a very young age, after all. For most of us, our first word was “no”, and it quickly became our favorite word. As toddlers and teenagers, we used “no” to

differentiate ourselves from our parents, peers, and surroundings. It’s how we began to control what was happening around us, or at least, how we tried to control that. It helped us over those early developmental hurdles, and gave us our earliest sense of our personal boundaries — and that’s a lot of significance bound up in such a tiny word!

The problem isn’t that “no” in and of itself is somehow bad; indeed, giving yourself permission to say “no” as an adult can keep you out of an awful lot of trouble.

The problem is that “No” begins to take on a life of its own. Too often, that life is yours.

Life is change, and “no” becomes a way of slowing down that change, or trying to stop it altogether. It is a shield we use to protect ourselves from having to experience anything new or different. Rather than riding the wave of change into a life full of exhilarating possibilities, we use “no” as a tether to keep us safely confined to the kiddie pool.

Using “no” to protect ourselves from change is like a kitten poking its head under covers, assuming it’s completely hidden. Change is going to happen, whether you say “no” to it or not. And, just like that kitten, assuming that “no” protects you from change is one sure way to have it pounce on you and bite your tail.

Let’s be honest here: We usually say “no” out of fear, and some fears are entirely reasonable. It’s sensible to say “no” to jumping off a bridge or “no” to cake if you are diabetic. These “no’s” aren’t the ones that keep us from living lives of incredible satisfaction and happiness. It’s those silly, neurotic fears like fearing rejection, or of looking stupid, or being wrong. It’s the fear of commitment, the fear of speaking out, and the fear of facing our truest, deepest desires. The list is nauseatingly long, and we’ve all bought into some of these at least once. These fears have shaped our lives, often to our detriment and sometimes to the detriment of those around us.

So the next time you’re faced with something new and exciting and all those little neurotic fears start rioting inside you, what does it take to fight down a “no” and say “yes” instead?

In a word: Courage.

Like the Cowardly Lion (an archetype for the fear-ridden) we need to find our courage. Unlike him, we know that we have to face our fears, and find our courage within. Inside each of us beats a brave, fiercely courageous heart, willing to take on a challenge if it means that life afterward will be more authentic, happier, and freer. What better challenges to tackle than the fears that keep us chained to our tiny, boring, closeted little lives?

Do yourself a favor: Right now, identify and tackle at least one of those inner fears. Find a reason to say “yes” today, and every day. You’ve only your inner coward to lose!

Each of us has an inner critic. There is no way to grow up in our society without having developed this inner critical voice &ndash which comes from parents, teachers, peers, the media, and from our own conclusions.

The problem is that this inner critic sounds like a voice of authority when in reality it doesn’t know what it is talking about. It is a voice based on beliefs that have been handed down through generations but that have no basis in fact.

How often has this voice said to you:

“You can’t do it. You are inadequate.”

“You are stupid and ugly.”

“If he (or she) rejects you, it is because you are not okay.”

“You had better do it right. If you don’t, everyone will know that you are a fraud.”

“It is NOT okay to make a mistake.”

…and so on.

This inner critic speaks with such authority that it is tempting to believe what it says. Yet is knows only lies. It knows nothing of who you really are.

When this voice is criticizing you, it is criticizing the “you” that it thinks you are &ndash your ego wounded self. The critic, having come into being to help you survive and protect you from rejection, long ago decided that who you really are is not good enough. When you experienced judgment or rejection from the important people in your life, you likely concluded that you were being rejected because you weren’t good enough or lovable enough or worthy enough or smart enough or attractive enough…and so on. You may have had no idea when you were being judged or rejected, rather than loved and accepted, that it actually had nothing to do with you. You probably had no idea that you cannot CAUSE another person to be judgmental or rejecting, or loving and accepting. You likely had no idea that others’ behavior is not under your control.

If you believed that you were causing others to judge or reject you, you may have decided that who you really are is not good enough. So you started to judge and reject yourself as you attempted to create a “self” that would be loved and accepted. The inner critic &ndash your ego wounded self &ndash is the self you created. You came to believe that if you judged yourself enough, you would make yourself into an acceptable person.

The problem is that none of this is true. There never was anything wrong with your true Self, your essence, your soul. It was, and is, a perfect expression of the Source from which we are all a part.

When your wounded self is criticizing you, it is criticizing your looks, your intelligence, or your performance. But none of this is who you are.

Who you are &ndash what is truly worthy, lovable and valuable about you &ndash is your ability to love. Not how you look, not how smart you are, not how much money you have or how big your house is. Your true Self is an individualized expression of God (or whatever you want to call our Source), and God is Love.

Next time you hear the authoritative voice of your inner critic, instead of giving that voice credence, stop listening to that voice. Treat that voice with compassion, like a child who acts like it knows everything. Instead of acting on that voice, open instead to the voice of your true Self &ndash the voice of Truth.

Do this simply by asking, with a deep desire to learn, “What is the truth?” Your Higher Self will answer you. This Self is the true voice of authority, even though it may be much softer and gentler than the loud voice of your inner critic.

Each time you hear the critical voice, ask your Higher Self “What is the truth?” If you take action based on the Truth rather than on the false beliefs of your inner critic, you will find yourself feeling so much better in so many ways!

What is stress?

Although we tend to think of stress as caused by external issues, issue in themselves are not stressful. It is the way in which we interpret and react to them that makes them stressful. People differ enormously in the type of events they interpret as stressful and the way in which they respond to such stress.

Stress is generally created when the demands made on a person start to exceed that person’s ability, or perceived ability to cope. Essentially a gap is created between what a person needs/wants to do, and what they feel they are able to do.

Many things or even the anticipation of them can lead to stress:

* Pressure to achieve/perform

* Problems at work

* Bullying

* Financial problems

* Arguments

* Family issues

* Divorce

* Bereavement

* Depression

* Unemployment

* Moving house

* Alcohol or drug abuse

Physical Symptoms of Stress may include:

* Tiredness

* Headaches

* Frequent colds

* Trouble sleeping

* Muscular aches/tension

* Nausea

* Sweating, feeling hot and bothered

Emotional and Mental Symptoms of Stress may include:

* Anger

* Anxiety

* Depression

* Irrational fears

* Mood swings

* Irritability

* Frustration

* Poor concentration

* Confusion

* Loss of sense of humour

* Negative thoughts

* Feeling of overwhelmed

* Feeling out of control

* Loss of motivation

Tackling stress

There are many strategies that can help you deal with stress:

* Realise that it is ok to be stressed and cut yourself some slack

* Try to understand what stresses you and why

* Avoid obvious stressful confrontations/situations

* Learn to be more assertive

* Take regular exercise

* Reduce alcohol

* Eat a balanced healthy diet

* Recognise your limits and learn to say no

* Organise your time better

* Keep your work/home space organised and tidy

* Talk to friends or family

* Listen to relaxing music, or read

* Take time out to relax

Alternatively you may benefit complementary therapies like aromatherapy, acupuncture and reflexology.

If your stress level is making it impossible for you to function as normal, it is perhaps worth seeing your GP as extreme or long-lasting stress can be very bad for your health, not to mention your relationships, so it is better to see a doctor sooner rather than later. Your GP can then advise you on the best course of action.

Do you trust your feelings and take action for yourself based on your feelings? Many of us grew up learning to mistrust our feelings. “Don’t be ridiculous,” my mother often said to me when I asked her why she was angry. “I’m not angry,” she would say with anger in her voice. “Don’t be ridiculous” was what I often heard in response to many of my feelings. So I learned to mistrust my feelings. It took me many years of inner work to regain trust in my feelings.

Feelings are information. Our feelings such as anger, anxiety, depression, and hurt are letting us know that we are telling ourselves something that is not true, or treating ourselves in unloving ways. Our uncomfortable or lonely feelings around another person may be telling us that the other person is being judgmental, needy, angry, blaming or inauthentic.

For example, Sally consulted with me because she often found herself repulsed by her husband’s sexual advances. She was confused because she loved Tim very much, and there were times when she was sexually attracted to him. But most of the time she was turned off to him.

“Sally, when Tim approaches you for sex, what is his energy like?”

“Most of the time, I feel like he is pulling on me and demanding something from me. It doesn’t feel loving, it feels needy. But when I say something about it to him, he tells me that it us my issue &ndash that he loves me and just wants to express his love. I get so confused.”

Sally has a hard time trusting her feelings because her mother was constantly invalidating her feelings as she was growing up. She has the same problem with a neighbor:

“It seems to me that Chelsea is often subtly judging my daughter in front of her, yet when I’ve said something to her she makes me feel like it’s my issue.”

“Sally, if you decided to trust and honor your feelings, what would you do differently with Tim and Chelsea?”

“Humm…well, I think I would stop being so tentative and stop judging myself and be firm with them.”

“So what would you say to Tim when he is needy with you?”

“I would say, ‘Tim, I love you and I am turned on to you when you come to me with your love, but not when you come to me with this empty needy energy.’”

“What would you say to Chelsea?”

“I would say, ‘Chelsea, it is not okay to judge my daughter. If you keep doing this, I will not spend time with you.’”

“And what would you say or do if they tried to make it your issue?”

“I think I would say, ‘This doesn’t feel good,’ and then walk away.

“How would you feel if you did this?”

“I would feel great!”

Andrew has a similar issue with his wife Susan. Andrew often feels Susan is being what he calls “not real.” “There is something about her that is often inauthentic &ndash like she is being a certain way to get approval from me and from others. I feel smothered by it and I shut down. Then she complains about my withdrawal and about my not wanting to have sex with her. But when I try to explain it to her, she gets angry and defensive and tells me that I have a problem with intimacy.”

“Andrew, you are not trusting and honoring your feelings, which does create a problem with intimacy because you withdraw rather than speak your truth. If you were to totally trust your feelings when Susan is being inauthentic and pulling for approval, you would speak your truth instead of withdraw. Susan doesn’t know when she is being inauthentic. She is just confused by your withdrawal. If you learn to trust your feelings and honor them by telling your truth, you will likely see much improvement in your relationship.”

Andrew was surprised to learn that Susan actually appreciated hearing his truth, and their relationship is gradually improving.

Do you ever feel that:

* Your life is out of your control?

* You are not where you could be or want to be?

* You don’t really receive the recognition you deserve?

* You don’t feel safe and secure in your relationships?

* You are often overlooked and undermined?

* You have strong desire but lack belief in your ability or the future?

* You are working harder but can’t seem to make any progress?

* You are frustrated because you can’t seem to break through the barriers in your life

* You are settling for less because it is still better than what other people have?

Do you ever wish that:

* You could have more confidence to do the things you really want to?

* You had more self esteem to stand up for what you believe in?

* You could command respect from your colleagues?

* You could impress others when they meet you?

* You could communicate your ideas with ease?

* You could stand up and speak in public?

What if you could do the above and:

* Eliminate Stress, Fear and Anxiety?

* Reclaim your Health by losing weight, quitting smoking, or dealing with other addictions?

* Improve all of your Relationships?

* Develop your Confidence and Self Esteem?

* Have more control over your life?

* Understand why people see you the way they do?

* Learn how to avoid these problems in the future?

Would you be willing to take the action necessary to bring about these outcomes? Is it just a wish you have, or is it a real desire to change? Have you ever thought “I deserve the best I can get in life and will do whatever it takes to get the best” If you are ready to give yourself the best in life, then please read contact us.

By the way the basic componants of behaviour are:

Be(behaviour)= Feel+Wish+Do

Each of us has a differing capacity of each, some prefer The Feelings (emotions) , some perfer Doing ( action) and other the Wishing( thoughts) , each has a profound cost and pay off. It also determines how you show up in life! And the capacity with which you live it fully,completely without limits. Only to figure that most of the programming to your behaviour happened at an unconcious level before your were even aware it existed. The turth of the matter is, by becoming aware of it you can then do something about it, and one of the best ways is with your Catalyst Coach.

Most people are familiar with the phrase “thoughts become things,” and in a manner of speaking that is true. However, the more accurate way to explain that concept would be to say that thoughts become emotions.

Emotions in turn drive the machine of your life that creates the things that you think about. The fact that emotions need to be part of the equation is easily verified by thinking back to any time in your life whenever you thought long and hard about having or doing something, but those thoughts never manifested into whatever it was that you were thinking about. For example:

• Many people think very often about having enough money to enjoy certain material possessions or experiences.

• Almost all people give considerable thought to weight loss, physical fitness, or their overall health.

• The majority of people also spend plenty of time thinking about satisfying romantic or other social relationships.

However, despite the massive amount of thought that is dedicated to some or all of those things, it is often the case that we do not have the level of success in those areas that we desire.

The reason for that is because we do not have the appropriate emotional attachment to the things that we want to bring into our lives. When giving thought to the things that we want, more is not necessarily better, since emotionless thoughts have no real power, no matter how many times we think them.

However, a consistent thought about something that also evokes a positive emotional response from you almost always serves to ultimately bring that thing into your life.

In order to illustrate this concept, simply think back to any job interview, health improvement program, date, or other social situation that you were involved in that you felt very positive and confident about. In most if not all of those situations, one of two things happened:

1) You attained or enjoyed the experience of whatever it was you felt positive about, or

2) You realized after the fact that you didn’t really want it after all.

By feeling positive and confident about attaining something, you put yourself in charge of the outcome, as opposed to how a lack of confidence will tend to make you feel powerless to get what you want out of any given situation.

You need to be honest with yourself, however, when considering whether or not you truly feel positive and confident about attaining something. Strongly desiring something does not equate to feeling positive or confident about acquiring it. Everyone wants whatever they consider to be financial, health, or social success, but actually believing that we will attain it is another matter entirely.

It is this difference between giving a high quantity of thought to something vs. giving a high quality of thought to something that is ultimately the deciding factor in whether or not we attain it.

High quality thoughts about something are thoughts that evoke a consistent positive emotional response in relation to that thing. These thoughts fill you with the belief that &ndash sooner or later &ndash you will attain whatever it is that you are thinking about.

Compare that to the thoughts that most people have about attaining their desires. You will see that often people’s thoughts about their dreams tend to evoke negative, disempowering emotional responses, such as doubt, fear, uncertainty, concern, lack of confidence, etc.

Rarely in history has anything of note been accomplished by someone thinking of how scared they were about whether or not it was actually going to happen. Disempowering thoughts such as fear do not tend to manifest positive results.

That is not to say that fear or similar feelings are not part of the process, because often they are. However, they are used only as tools to bolster the confidence and belief level of the person involved, as squashing disempowering feelings has the immediate effect of causing us to feel empowered! If you have ever faced down a fear, then you know this to be true.

The bottom line solution to using the power of your emotions as the fuel for self improvement is to make a conscious recognition of how you feel about something that you want to accomplish.

If the thought of improving your finances, your health, your social life, or any other area of your life causes you to feel anything other than positive and confident, you must embrace the fact that you have mental roadblocks that need to be cleared before you will achieve success in that area.

Those roadblocks can then be cleared by engaging in whatever activity will eliminate those negative feelings. That may include getting educated about what it will take to accomplish your goal, it may mean practicing affirmations or visualizations, it might involve doing research on the topic, hiring a professional to help you, or even something as simple as voicing the disempowering belief to yourself.

Once the dark things in our subconscious are brought into the light, they are often seen to have very little actual power over us, if any at all. Ferret out your negative, disempowering beliefs by being 100% truthful with yourself about how you feel about something that you want to attain.

Once you have recognized whatever it is that is causing your negative feelings, drag it kicking and screaming into the light, eliminate it, and you will leave yourself with nothing but positive and confident feelings about your ability to succeed. Then you will do exactly that!

For years many of us have been working towards goals that never come to anything, or wanting to achieve something that just keeps eluding us.

At first we journey down the road called “blame” - after all it’s easier to believe that some one or some thing is responsible for us not achieving what we set out to do.

Then one day comes the realization that blame achieves nothing and that looking at how we are responsible for the results we produce in our life is a more powerful method.

After that realization we may then begin to look at those people who have achieved our interpretation of success and wonder what their “secret” must be.

If they managed to focus on and create success from a goal they set themselves, why not you?

If you want to give up smoking why can’t that happen for you? If you want to attain success in business, why can’t that happen for you?

If you are looking for the partner of your dreams, why shouldn’t you find yours?

And so a search begins in books, audios, DVDs, seminars, workshops, more seminars!

For some people the search for whatever they believe the “secret” is continues for years, thousands spent on their personal development and still life sucks!

So firstly let me help you end the search because you will not believe this but what you have been looking for is right before your eyes, you have been searching for something that has been in front of you the whole time. You have been searching for yourself!

Seminars, audios, books, mentors, life coaches &ndash these are all fantastic tools that I highly recommend to anyone working towards success but ultimately you must begin to trust in your ability, your own judgement and stop believing that these tools know more about you than you do yourself.

The secret is…….There is no secret. Everything we need we already have. The question is can you trust your own judgement enough to believe that?

Q. What happens when we let ourselves become dominated by negative responses to life, e.g. destructive behaviour patterns, negative emotions, apathy, etc? We find ourselves getting “worked up,” often to the detriment of our own wellbeing as well as to those around us.

The result? We risk becoming increasingly angry and bitter about aspects of our life that we believe we have little or no control over. The solution? To explore the reality behind these actions and emotions, and transform them into positive causes.

Q. Are You?

- Too Easily “Affected” By Your Environment?

- Guilty Of Feeling Anger And/Or Resentment?

- Often Letting Yourself And Others Down As A Result?

Begin making the transformation today!

Q. What’s In It For You?

- Discover The Reality Behind These “Reactions”

- Develop Ways Of Recognising And Countering Them

- Master How To Transform Them Into Positive and Proactive Causes

By learning to transform our negative “reactions” into positive “proactions”, we create a far healthier state of physical and emotional wellbeing for ourselves and our environment. In turn, we become increasingly capable and responsible as individuals, and when faced with greater challenges we automatically find ourselves better equipped to deal with them and move on.

How do we achieve this? Simple &ndash first we have to acknowledge what it is that’s encouraging us to react in this way and then turn it around so as to create something more positive. For example, instead of reacting aggressively to a particular comment, we can learn to respond more appropriately by understanding what triggered that reaction coupled with its negative impact on ourselves and our environment. As soon as we’ve got to grips with the cause, we’re able to turn it on its head and understand what it is we need to be or do differently. Another example: instead of responding with a defeatist, “I can’t do anything about it,” try saying, “I understand it’s been difficult in the past, but this time I’m going to look at alternatives.” Result &ndash in addition to becoming far happier and resilient in ourselves, we naturally radiate the benefits of such actions to others.

INQUIRY: Take a look back at some recent situations when you allowed yourself to react negatively or angrily. What triggered this behaviour? What were your emotions and feelings before, during and after? Had you responded in a more proactive manner, what would you have done differently and what would have been the outcome?

ACTION: For the next thirty days, explore the reality that’s causing you to react negatively to your life and your environment. Learn from the above and check in with any emotions and feelings. Get to grips with what it is you need to be and do differently and put it into action. Notice the difference you create within yourself and those around you.

I wish you every success as you Transform Negative “Reactions” Into Positive “Proactions” …

Best wishes

Simon

“Man must cease attributing his problems to his environment, and learn again to exercise his will - his personal responsibility.” Albert Einstein

At a certain point our lives don’t change much. We’re moving around on automatic pilot and don’t notice the sameness that has taken over&ndashsometimes for many years. We’ve gotten used to very little occurring in our lives beyond our daily routine, and many people become comfortable with that, or just accept it. Somewhere along the way our lives got stale. We’re stuck in a rut. But don’t despair; being in control of your own life is being in control of your wellness!

More and more people are regaining control of their lives and changing their futures. They’re setting goals and reaching them, they’re feeling better, being happier, getting healthier and spending more time and energy on what matters to them. Their outlook on life has improved dramatically.

As you know, the concept of wellness covers a broad range&ndashwith different definitions depending on where you look. But for starters, let’s use the following&ndashwellness is the belief that improvement is possible throughout our lives. We’re continuously seeking information on how we can improve. We’re choosing options and making decisions that support our best interests. Everything we think, feel and believe impacts our whole being. You are in command of all aspects of your life&ndashphysical, career, relationships, finances, spiritual, environment, and emotional well-being, and so on. You can break free and take charge of your life. Try these simple ways to discover how you can start moving towards taking control of your life and wellness.

1. Turn lack of time into more time.

“I don’t have the time,” that’s what John, a corporate attorney, constantly told himself and others. He knew he wasn’t alone. Lack of time was a concern for nearly every person he knew. John really wanted to be happier and healthier, but he just didn’t have free time to date, visit family, exercise, or any of the other things that made him happy. When John decided he had to take control of his wellness, the first thing he did was regain ownership of his time. He examined how he spent his time on an average day. By jotting down his daily activities and realigning his priorities, John found opportunities to include the things he really cared about in his daily life.

2. Reclaim your energy.

Megan, a wife, mom and marketing executive, was always tired. She had no energy to meet the demands of her job, do housework, run errands, cook, take care of her children, or the other priorities that made up her day. Megan desperately needed to reclaim her energy&ndashbut instead, she let people drain it, steal it and suck it away. To begin, Megan examined the areas of her life that needed more attention and focus. She also drew new boundaries to protect herself, by declaring what she would and wouldn’t allow. Instead of working 12 hours, Megan cut her workday to no more than nine hours. She stuck to her plan, reclaimed her energy, and is there for her family and job with a new, revitalized energy.

3. Make lasting changes.

“Our resistance to making lasting changes is innate,” says Jeff, a mortgage loan officer. “It’s such a big challenge for everybody.” He constantly told himself that his inner resistance to making changes would stay with him forever. Jeff’s first step was to recognize that resistance is always the initial barrier to making changes. For example, losing the 70 pounds his doctor recommended would offset having to take daily medication for his Type II diabetes. Jeff started by being open to seeing the positive side of change&ndashi.e., first making a decision to change, and then enlisting help in doing so. He joined the YMCA, and now participates in Tai Chi and walks five days a week. He’s also met with a nutritionist who has helped him gain a better understanding of what to eat in order to maintain his overall health and well-being. Jeff has lost 30 pounds and continues to maintain a healthy, balanced diet.

4. Set boundaries around your life.

What’s one of the shortest words&ndashyet so difficult for many people to utter? If you guessed “No,” you’re right on the money. Sidney, a customer service supervisor was so afraid of saying no that when someone asked her to do something, she felt queasy inside because she wanted to say no, but felt uncomfortable actually doing it. The first thing she needed to do was learn her limits. She realized that learning to say no to the things that she didn’t want to do would help her reduce the stress of excessive demands on her time and energy. Sidney could say no in a way that was comfortable to her, yet respectful to the other person. Many people believe when someone makes a request of you, you must say yes, but saying no isn’t that horrible! When Sidney began saying no, it changed her whole life; she found her “to do” list shrinking. She recognized that it was her choice to either overload her schedule or only accept requests to do something when she wanted to.

5. Take excellent care of yourself.

Eden, an emergency room specialist, wanted to improve her quality of life. She was bored with her daily routine, and her social life was nonexistent. Eden began making changes for the better by putting her needs first. She focused on what she wanted, instead of others’ desires. She began scheduling two social activities on her calendar each month, in order to create a social life. Eden never really enjoyed living in the suburbs, but she was close to her job. She put together an action plan for re-inventing her life. The first thing she did was sell her house in the suburbs and move to a more urban environment in which she always dreamed. She could walk to quaint caf