My Essay Blog

Throughout our lives we have various requirements that must be met. These are our needs and desires, which range from basic physical needs to selfless desire. When any of these are not met, negative physical, mental, and emotional complications and addictions can result, sometimes with distressful consequences. This discussion is about needs.

A need is an explicit requirement, like feeling hungry and demanding to eat or seeking assurance when you feel unloved and insecure. Satisfying a need means that it has been gratified, relieved, and discharged. Once you feel satisfied, your attention easily turns to something else.

The following list of needs is inspired by the work of Abraham Maslow.

Physical needs. Food, water, safety, shelter, health, basic comfort and income.

Security. You feel secure when you feel wanted, accepted, loved, and supported by others, and are able to feel a sense of belonging.

Connection. The drive to meaningfully relate, involve, give and receive, procreate and/or experience sexual fulfillment.

Self-esteem. You need confidence, competence, respect and power. When you feel approval, recognition and admiration from others, you naturally feel these for yourself and others. This develops the confidence needed to risk and strive. From competence and achievement, you develop assurance, poise, and power. Esteem in all these ways is preeminent to favorable development and behavior.

Integrity. This results from fulfilling your agreements with yourself and others. Because you carefully consider possible consequences, you are discerning in your choices and are thereby able to trust yourself.

Satisfying basic needs is primary. Without doing so, you are distracted, out of balance, and out of peace. If numerous needs are unsatisfied, then your disturbances are complicated and magnified. Your daily activities and creative flow are biased and directed toward the satisfaction of your unmet need(s). Your focus is distracted and skewed, your life is entangled with problems, and your fulfillment will be forever compromised.

Since most people don’t know how to address their unmet needs, they turn their attention to what seems easier. And yet it never truly works because weakness arises. For example, a person becomes a great singer, yet never learns how to develop or maintain healthy intimate relationships.

To satisfy basic needs one must feel the insecurity that develops from its lack, then determine the best way to effectively address it. However, many people lack the requisite trust, strength and method by which to do so. This inhibits healthy progress because they fear they will be weakened by admitting the lack; yet they will actually be strengthened.

The key is to identify the unsatisfied need that the negative behavior attempts to satisfy. Next, replace that negative behavior with a positive equivalent. For example, returning alone to her hotel room feeling the high of a concert, the great singer typically orders her favorite goodies, eats heartily, and grows larger. By determining that she never learned how to develop and maintain healthy relationships, she is able to decide how to begin developing satisfying relationships, even while touring.

Indeed, satisfying basic needs is necessary because it provides the foundation for all else to develop, and supports you to reach your optimum levels. Satisfying basic needs is fundamental to clarity, peace, and overall well-being, and supports your potential to be realized.

Feeling frustrated by your job is a very common occurrence. Many people feel they are in a lower position they are capable of performing and are not quite sure how to get to the next level of responsibility. Much of this is caused by the way we have programmed our brains to think and react to situations. An NLP training course can help.

A Brief Definition of Neuro-linguistic programming

Neuro-linguistic programming, or NLP, is a set of models of how communication impacts and is impacted by subjective experience. In addition to being an agent for change, NLP is also used in psychotherapy treatments for problems as diverse as phobias and schizophrenia. NLP also aims at transforming corporations, showing them how to accomplish their maximum potential and achieve great success.

The developers of NLP

The theories and application of NLP were co-created by two men in the 1970’s. One a linguist, John Grinder and his partner Richard Bandler. The initial focus of their experiments in NLP was to discover what gave three psychotherapists the advantage in successfully treating their clients. These three psychotherapists, gestalt therapist Fritz Perls, family therapist Virginia Satir and founding president of the American Society for Clinical Hypnosis, Milton H. Erickson, were more successful in treatment than that of their peers.

Timeline of NLP

1970: Founding and early development

1972: Research of Fritz Perls, Virginia Satir and Milton H. Erickson begins.

1975: Subsequently Structure of Magic Series published

1976-77: Patterns of the Hypnotic Techniques of Milton H. Erickson published

1979: Frogs into Princes: Neuro Linguistic Programming published

1980: Neuro-Linguistic Programming: Volume I published

1980: Bandler and Grinder go their separate ways

1981: The first of many intellectual property lawsuits begin. NLP Training courses begin to be developed by many individuals. Given the diversity of developers and trainers, there is no single definitive system of NLP.

1982-87: Grinder and Judith DeLozier collaborated to develop the New Code of NLP.

1984-87: Research reviews in experimental counselling psychology by the United States National Research Council gave NLP an overall negative assessment marking a decrease in NLP research interest

1988-89: Bandler develops Design Human Engineering

As a Life Coach, and after coaching many different clients, I have come to realize that to effectively manage time, we need to first realize that time itself cannot be managed! We all get seven days a week and 168 hours within those seven days. This cannot be increased or changed in any way. However, what we can change, improve and manage is ourselves. In essence then, true time management now becomes management of ourselves &ndash “self management!”

So being aware of this, we now know that it’s not the amount of time we have that’s important; it’s how effectively we use that time that makes the difference. Successful people have exactly the same amount of time in the day as each of us. The only difference is they use their time differently &ndash more effectively.

You might say “I don’t have the time to commit to learning some time management skills”. I hear this a lot during life coaching sessions, but the fact is if this were true, do you really think you have the time not to?

Time management principles and techniques are usually quite simple to learn. They do not require deep thinking, a high I.Q or lots of preparation. In fact if you were to put the search term “Time Management Resources” into a search engine you will get dozens of websites offering help, advice, tips and suggestions on how to manage and prioritize your time.

To sum time management up I would say you need to ask yourself two questions:

1. Do I physically have enough time to do the tasks that are required of me? We only have so much time. Sometimes it’s not always physically possible to fit everything in. If this is the case then you need to prioritize and drop some of the low priority task/activities to claim some time back.

2. Do I fully optimize and use my time effectively? If the answer is NO then you might want to learn and implement some time management principles and techniques.

Below is a list of some time management (self management) techniques and tips that I use during life coaching. You may find a couple of them helpful yourself. They are in no particular order.

• Figure out when (what time of the day?) you work most efficiently.

• Establish your priorities for what you want to get done. Identify the tasks and activities that are the highest priority and eliminate those of low priority.

• Allow more time than you think you will need. This makes your schedule flexible and allows for the unexpected.

• Get into the habit of using your odd five minutes here and there more productively. Don’t just dismiss it as only five minutes &ndash they add up throughout the week!

• Accomplish one or two important tasks rather than lots unimportant ones.

• Keep a calendar/diary. Mark all your important dates/tasks.

• Keep a list of “Things to Do” and mark them off as completed.

• Every day make a list of what you have to do tomorrow.

• When possible do the unpleasant tasks first.

• Tidiness makes your life easier and reduces stress.

• Allow time to relax, recharge and do nothing.

• Leave time in your schedule for un-planned activities.

• Know your strengths, skills and weakness.

• Ask yourself, “What am I doing that someone else could do for me?” Delegate!

• Don’t be scared to ask for help

• Bin things straight away to reduce the clutter (junk mail, newspapers and spam email etc).

• Divide large overwhelming tasks into smaller chunks, and attack them one at a time.

• Complete at least one task each day that you don’t like to do, but know you should.

• Realize that all your email checking, surfing the internet and other procrastinations add up to hours of lost time each week (sometime even each day!)

• Watch less T.V. If you watch T.V for three hours a day from the age of five years old, by the time you are fifty five the amount of T.V you will have watched will be the equivalent to watching non-stop 24 hours a day for six years and three months. If you cut this down by just one hour a day, so then only watch two hours of T.V, you will have gained back over two years worth of time.

“Living is the constant process of deciding what we are going to do” (Jose Ortega y Gasset)

I have just returned from my twelve year old step-daughters parents evening. It was an interesting hour and I believe my daughter has learnt quite a lot from the experience. The teachers gave her some important life coaching advice which I will write about in this article.

My step-daughters name is Taryn and she is basically a very bright and well behaved child. One of her faults however is that she just does enough, she is not naughty at school but does not give one hundred percent to her studies.

Before we attended the parents evening we had the opportunity to read her school report. Taryn thought this report was very good as she was above average in her year, this was certainly borne out in her recent examination results. What annoyed both me and her mother was the regular comments that Taryn does not ask enough questions, that she does not contribute enough in classroom discussions and that her homework seems rushed.

We were also aware that even though the exam results were good, that they could have been even better as she did not do any revision. We told her that even though she was above average that we were not happy with some of the comments made which suggested that she could and should have done even better. Taryn was not happy by this and had quite a big strop thinking that we were just being cruel.

Taryn loves to play sport and has been a regular in the netball and athletic teams. The first teacher she took us to see was her sports teacher who Taryn assumed would be very happy with her. This teacher first asked how we as her parents thought Taryn was getting on, in general at school. We voiced our concerns and the teacher agreed as she had read the whole report and was also not that pleased with it. She looked at Taryn and told her that in sport she always gave one hundred percent and asked her why she did not have the same attitude in Maths and English. Taryn did not know what to say and seemed quite shocked. The teacher stated that even though sport is important, the other subjects should come first and that if she did not see a marked improvement over the next few months, that she would drop her from the netball and athletics team.

Next was the English teacher. He told all of us that Taryn was very clever but that she needed to take more of a pride in her work. She needs to check what she has completed before she hands it in, as the only real errors she makes are just silly mistakes.

He believed that even though Taryn was in the top thirty percent that she should be in the top ten percent.

All of the teachers we met gave Taryn the same message. Do not accept second best, always give one hundred percent, spend less time on the computer and more time reading and revising.

By the end of the evening poor old Taryn looked shell shocked. She now understands what to do and certainly does not want to be kicked out of the sports teams.

I was more than pleased with the schools attitude and believe that Taryn has been given some important life coaching advice.

Many people really love the thought of taking the chance and living in a foreign country. It sounds so dreamy and romantic. But the reality for many expats is that very shortly after arrival in their new home, they find that there are often harsh realities to face about living abroad. Dreamy visions of spending the days picking tropical fruits, lazing on the beach, growing a lush garden and leisurely wandering through the market places can be replaced with realities such as no hot water, dirt roads, electricity shortages, no English or very little among many other factors. Ones’ hopes of getting online as soon as you arrive could be quickly dashed. How frustrating it is when you pop down to the local store for some needed necessities and you are met with a sign that reads, “Open Mon, Wed and Fri”. The fact is that daily life abroad can be quite tough initially. Stress can take its charge both physically and emotionally.

Yes, this may sound quite depressing, but don’t let it get you down. If you have your “toolbox” packed, the living abroad experience can be the best time of your life. In fact it could change your life as a whole for the better. The key to this outcome is finding a way to manage your day-to-day life. As an expatriate you need to find ways to free yourself of the difficulties you will inevitably encounter and thrive no matter what the conditions or perceived obstacles are.

The “toolbox” carries the following concepts which when applied will help to make your living abroad experience an adventure and not a disaster.

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Adjust: Firstly we need to learn how to adjust. Adapt yourself to your new surroundings and the new way of life. Discover the culture for yourself. Accustom, reconcile and reorganize your life to fit in with your new surroundings.

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Flexible: Always be flexible. Different countries perform functions and activities in different ways and at a different pace. Flexibility and understanding will save you a lot of stress and you will get along so much better.

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Observe: Pay attention and observe! This is crucial to making it in a new land. Read up and become knowledgeable on your subject. Cultural books and tourist guides very often hold important information on a new culture, but I have to say that some of the best ways to learn are by observing firsthand. Watch how people greet one another. Make note of what is considered as appropriate behavior and what is not. This applies to language too. Keep your eyes open at all times.

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Attitude: Be part of the solution and not part of the problem. Find ways to do things. Have a positive and active attitude. I believe that attitude accounts for the success or failure of most things in life, including living abroad. Attitude will make the difference between a happy or disgruntled expat.

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Experience: Find ways to get involved. Do not be an observer of your experience. Be the experience! Take full advantage of all the new and wonderful activities and opportunities to learn new things. Try the new foods, go exploring, sign up for Spanish classes or join the taekwondo club.

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Support: Find people who are in a similar situation to you. Form a group and support each other. Once the honeymoon phase and excitement of moving to a new country passes and the realities of living abroad set in you will need people who you can count on to help you make this a truly memorable experience.

Quote of the week

“Success is simple. Do what’s right, the right way, at the right time.” Arnold H. Glasgow.

Powerful action plan for the week

How would your life be different if you applied the concepts of the toolbox to your to your life everyday? Try it for one week and make note of the outcome.

Life consistently presents us with challenges and changes and at times this can lead to us feeling stressed. Planning how to manage and cope in various life situations, and finding out which coping skills work best for you, is the key to succeeding with stress rather then experiencing distress. When clients come to see me for NLP and CBT therapy in Hemel Hempstead, Hertfordshire, it is a big part of therapy that they develop and become confident in employing coping skills. This article contains ideas for coping with stress and also acute emotional crises. If you are experiencing stress or emotional imbalance, CBT and hypnotherapy is available in Hemel Hempstead, Hertfordshire.

Here are some ideas for coping with stress:

1. Understand more about stress &ndash this involves recognising your sources of stress and how stress affects you personally. Plan for stressful periods.

2. Problem-solve &ndash what is the problem, be specific and break it down into realistic achievable components. Then set goals on how to deal with each problem. Make sure you include how to begin your plan of action.

3. Develop new behaviour &ndash if you take on too much or have problems saying no, learn to be assertive. There are plenty of courses at local colleges or you may prefer to see a therapist 1:1. Learn to manage your time more effectively and delegate wherever possible! Avoid procrastination; whilst you are not doing it, you’ll only be spending energy worrying about it.

4. Make sure you develop a support network &ndash deliberately develop good supportive relationships. Ask for help when needed and accept it when offered. You must also be prepared to do the same for others.

5. Make time to relax and enjoy yourself &ndash how many of us know we should do more of this but don’t make the time? Set aside time each day to relax and build this into your routine. Develop hobbies and leisure activities that help you too switch off.

Can you imagine yourself doing any of these activities when you need to cope?

Asserting yourself - Contacting one of your supports - Listening to music

Exercising- Taking a break - Going to a movie -Reading a book -Laughing/crying - Taking a walk - Taking a nice long bath - Writing a letter or a journal - Learning something new - Eating something healthy &ndash Helping someone else.

It is important to identify and practice using coping tools if you want to be able to deal with your stress successfully. Obviously, it is not always possible to plan for stress as situations can happen that we do not expect. If you find yourself experiencing a period of crises, or intense painful emotions there are still coping strategies that you can employ in that moment.

Ideas For Coping with Acute Emotional Distress

1. Use of distraction &ndash the aim of this is to limit the time you spend in contact with the emotional stimuli, the things that are causing you to feel emotional. The stimuli could be anything from another person to the thoughts that you are having. Distraction involves doing something else to absorb your attention.

2. Imagery &ndash think of safe and soothing images. This involves imagining images that make you feel good, it may be a favourite place, person, pet or scenes from nature.

3. Relaxation &ndash learn a simple technique like using peripheral vision to induce relaxation. Peripheral vision is effective at switching on the parasympathetic nervous system, which is the part of the nervous system responsible for making us feel calm. It’s not possible to feel anxious or distressed whilst fully relaxed in peripheral vision.

4. One thing in the moment &ndash as adults we tend to spend much of our time stuck contemplating what went wrong in the past or what may go wrong in the future. Try and just focus on the ‘moment’. Perhaps this may involve thinking something like ‘I’m in my house in my favourite chair, I’m warm and comfortable and I have a good book to read’.

5. Exercise &ndash physical activity can help to disperse the chemicals released in your body by the stress response. It also releases feel good chemicals known as endorphins.

6. Sooth yourself - do something to nurture your 5 senses. Be kind and gentle to yourself.

Coaching can cover many different areas from sport to business and it is essential that you make yourself aware of coaching in general before you get involved in a single area. If you joined a sport in grade school you had a coach explain to you the rules and the best strategy to use to help win the game. In high school you had this same advantage, but once you reach the grown up world you may think you don’t have this advantage anymore. This is not always true, there are coaches out there to help you be the best you possibly and this also applies to the business world as well.

Over the years companies have realized that using coaches in the business world can make a big difference in their corporation. Coaches in the business world can really help, for example if you are an employee trying to get a head it can give you an advantage over other employees. If you are a supervisor who hires a coach for the employee you may be giving your company an advantage over other companies. Whichever way fits your needs it is a fact coaching can make an impact in the world of industry.

Just because an offer from a coach sounds good, in reality it may not be the right one for you; therefore you need to be sure and check out all the information given to you before accepting an offer. Don?t accept the first offer that come to you, check out several choices, compare, and then choose. You are searching for a coach that can offer you the most help in the areas of business that you are concerned with, along with someone with a good reputation of proving themselves as an excellent coach.

Accessing the web to look for a coach that would be right for you is probably the best way to find one. You are looking for a coach that makes you feel comfortable and relaxed; after all you do have to pay for their services. You cannot find a coach that will be perfect in every area, but you can come real close by searching online. Keep in mind that hiring a coach that comes as close to what you need, will benefit you the most.

When you have chosen a coach and they have started to work for you, they will be able to see things that you may have overlooked. Because of this you may have to make some changes that you don?t feel comfortable with or don?t really understand. This is why it is important for you to trust the coach and let them make some changes to improve your business. A great coach will show you what can be accomplished in the future, by making changes now; you may have choices you never knew existed before.

After you have gotten rid of some old habits and found newer better ones to use, you may find that you can accomplish anything you set out to do. Having a good coach will definitely help you to achieve this, even though it may seem hard at first letting another person tell you how to run your business.

Many employees seem to accomplish more if they have a coach assisting them along the way; this is one good reason for an employer to hire a coach. Sometimes the employer may want to hire a coach to help them advance their skills of management even further than they already have. Whatever the reason for hiring a coach, either for the employer or the employee, the company will benefit from the added contribution. If you are employed at a company that does not provide a coach, you can always hire your own to help you improve and advance your career.

After researching and finding the coach you feel is best for your company, you may want to use that same coach for yourself. This is why it may be a good idea to find one that is also qualified in the area of management. You can review a first hand evaluation of the coach?s ability, and know if he can improve your skills, helping you to accomplish your goals. Now that you are aware of the basics of coaching you can now proceed with ease into the are that most interests you.

To grow and evolve, we need relationships for mirroring and feedback. Yet fear, negative assumptions and coping strategies can erode or destroy relationships. When we design relationships together with loving cooperation, they can be both enjoyed and utilized for conscious transformation.

This activity is designed to help you transform a current personal or professional relationship into a supportive experience, or imagine the best one for you. Write your responses in complete sentences. Be patient with the process, and yourself. This activity will be both the foundation of and guide for your relationship. Give it heart and soul from the beginning, and you will be richly rewarded many times over. An adventure awaits you. Have fun!

1) Determine your objective. You are doing this:

- Alone to manifest a completely new relationship

- Alone, to imagine the possibilities with an existing relationship

- Together, with someone with whom you are in relationship

2) Why do you want this relationship? What need does it satisfy? Why is this important to you?

3) Why do you think your partner wants a relationship with you?

4) How is this relationship different and unique from your other relationships?

5) Describe the kind of relationship you want. Describe what you actually do, and what you want each to give each other. Include why you think you fit each other’s needs, values, preferences and standards.

6) On a scale of 1-10 (10 being high), what level of truth and trust do you want through this relationship? Explain why. What is its current level? If there is a discrepancy between the two, explain. Describe and explain what you are ready to do to enjoy this level of trust.

7) What feeling do you want to project to others? What is lacking or inconsistent? What are you ready to do about it?

What limiting patterns do you want to release? How do you want to be supported to change? How can you support your partner to release her/his limiting patterns?

9) Describe your attitudes, beliefs and conflicting values that will interfere with the partnering you described. Evaluate these and determine how to replace them with honoring attitudes, beliefs and values.

10) Determine your confidence with open, nonjudgmental communication, especially in awkward and challenging circumstances. Describe the changes you are ready to make.

11) Recall and describe the fears, resistances and limiting patterns you experienced while completing this activity. List them in priority order and explain what you are ready to do about them.

12) What must you learn and what skills must you develop, to better serve your partner, especially through challenging times? What resources will you draw upon? List the steps you will take and include dates, when appropriate.

13) How have your ideas, perceptions or feelings about partnering developed or changed from doing this activity? What will you do as a result?

14) Reflect on the points especially important to you, and describe how you feel empowered.

Word of mouth is one of the most effective ways to grow your coaching business. It’s free, or at most costs very little, yet very few coaches use it to anywhere near it’s potential!

Consider this: if you got just one referral from each one of your clients, over the next 60 days you’d double your client base! What would that mean to your potential income and how many more people would you be helping in supportive and uplifting ways?

So, how do you maximize word of mouth? Here are 5 Steps you can take now…

1. Really appreciate your clients and let them know consistently you value them

This is the most important, yet overlooked element of creating endless referrals. Many businesses focus more on profits than on people. Focusing on profits alone can be detrimental to success and ‘Word of Mouth’ success comes from looking beyond just profit into how you can enrich your customer’s lives.

Action: At least once a month, take the time to communicate to each of your clients and show them you appreciate them. Send them something of value, something unexpected, a bonus report, a special piece of news you just found. Make it relevant to them and do it regularly.

2. Create an exceptional experience each time they deal with you or your company

If you can make doing business with you an exceptional experience, your clients will want to tell a lot of people. People want amazing experiences!

Here is an example: There is a Life Coach in Brisbane who has a special relationship with a city coffee shop. Once every 8 weeks he invites his clients to a ‘brains trust’ meeting and the coffee and cake is on the house. Every client that attends gets a card and a voucher from the coffee shop owner to say ‘Thank you for joining us today, we would love to see you again soon’. The voucher is a ‘buy one get one free’ coffee voucher. So they are encouraged to come back again. And because the coffee shop owner is exposing his business to potential new clients the coach pays just cost price on the coffee and cake his clients eat. Normally about 8 clients attend and the cost is around $30. Just a little extra touch can make dealing with your business that much more of an exceptional experience!

Action: What can you do now to add little things that make an exceptional experience? Perhaps you can use the above example or something similar. Remember, start creating exceptional experiences today.

3. Give your customers incentives for giving you referrals

If you’re being passive about referrals then you’re sitting on a gold-mine. Come up with ways of rewarding your clients for referring business to you. They could receive free gifts, such as a 30 minute back massage voucher for referring a friend or a free Style Cut from an award winning beauty salon. The businesses involved would welcome the opportunity to have new clients come their way and would be happy to give that first style cut or treatment for free if they understand the potential value of a new customer.

Action: Reward your clients for referring people to you. Come up with rewards that will be beneficial to your clients. If you worked with executive clients perhaps a free 30 minute health check at a trusted health centre would be valuable or a voucher to use at an upmarket clothing boutique.

4. Make it easy for clients to give you referrals

If you want to get lots of referrals, you must make it incredibly easy for your clients to tell their friends. Don’t expect them to go way out of the way to help you grow your business. Make it as simple as possible.

Action: Develop a ‘referral package’ that you give to your clients. Ask your clients to be an ambassador for your business as you wish to work with people similar to them. The package would include a letter explaining why referrals are important to you, and a series of referral cards that your client can give out to others. Present it professionally and it will hold more value, more worth.

5. Ask at the right time!

When is the best time to ask for referrals? Any time! If you have followed the steps listed above…you’ve let clients know they are appreciated, you’ve made dealing with you an exceptional experience, you give them an incentive to share your message with friends and you make it easy for them to do so…you can ask for referrals at any time.

Action: The key is to do something now. Draft up a letter or e-mail today and just send it off to your clients letting them know how much you value them, who much you have enjoyed working with them in the past and include something that is going to be helpful, useful for them to use, read or understand. Then over the next 4 to 6 weeks develop your ‘referral package’ and start to use it. Take yourself out of your comfort zone and take action….because if you don’t someone will and what will that mean to your business in the years to come.

When a spouse is assigned an overseas assignment, the partner is faced with many obstacles that are often ignored. Unfortunately at this time not too many companies offer their support to the spouse.

According to research done by Val Boyko into ‘global solutions for international assignments’ at the Families in Global Transition conference in 2004, she found that the partner’s biggest challenges are that they feel:

* Unrecognized.

* Unsupported.

* Let down because of inaccurate or irrelevant information.

* Isolated.

Maybe you or a friend is experiencing life as an expat partner where you thought you would be able to work, but have found out that it was is a near impossibility; or that you have assumed that internet access would be easily available to maintain contact with friends and family only to discover that it takes months to get connected; or you are a newcomer without an expat community around you AND you can’t speak the language.

This happens all the time to expat spouses.

So what is the solution?

Tips for the expat spouse

1. Team Work:

Try and get everyone to work together to understand and accept your needs as a spouse. Speak to whoever is in charge of the expat assignment, build up a relationship with him or her before you move and become as informed as you can. Encourage them to give you honest and accurate expectations so that you can make the best choices for yourself and for your family.

2. Your role:

Find out about the issues that generally face expat spouses. Make yourself aware of the challenges you will meet. Take up the responsibility and to make it your business to know. Do not rely on others to provide you give you what you may need.

3. Support:

Make contact with existing expats in the country you are about to move to through groups, message boards, and online forums. Set up a relationship and support system for yourself even before you land at the airport. Begin to explore possibilities before you head out on your new adventure.

4. Education:

Educate yourself - there really is so much information on the web. Don’t assume that the experience will be similar to your impressions. It often is not! So be curious and pro-active. Do not be afraid to ask for help. Let others know what you need. People want to help and it could be your very lifesaver in a time of need.

And finally…you may want consider hiring your own coach to give a speedy start to your overseas success!

Quote of the week

“Don’t wait until everything is just right. It will never be perfect. There will always be challenges, obstacles and less than perfect conditions. So what. Get started now. With each step you take, you will grow stronger and stronger, more and more skilled, more and more successful.” Mark Victor Hansen.

Powerful question of the week

“What would you like to happen now, this week, next year .?”

Write it down, be specific and make an action plan to make it happen.

Expat lifecoach

As an Expat Life Coach, my purpose is to support expatriate assignees, their spouses and families in developing tools that will help make the expat experience work for them. If you are skeptical or curious about how the coaching process works, feel free to take up my offer of a COMPLIMENTARY coaching session. After the session, you can take whatever tools you developed to support yourself along your expat journey. Please email me to set up your FREE session.