My Essay Blog

Dr. William Glasser developed the concepts of Choice Theory upon the foundational work of Dr. William Power’s Control Theory. Both theories provide an explanation of human behavior&ndashPowers focuses mostly on perception while Glasser expanded his ideas to include basic human needs and the concept of total behavior&ndashincluding a person’s actions, thinking, feeling and physiology.

Choice Theory provides an explanation of human behavior. Once learned, individuals will understand how everyone is doing the best they can to get their needs met. This understanding generates an empathy for other people’s situation and a desire to assist them in making more responsible choices.

So what does this have to do with you? Here are the top ten things Choice Theory can do for you and your organization.

1. When individuals in your company learn and practice the concepts of Choice Theory, their life satisfaction with be increased, making them more pleasant and productive.

2. When your leaders in the company learn and apply the concepts of Choice Theory, greater teamwork develops and quality of your goods or services is enhanced.

3. When individuals learn and practice Choice Theory in their personal lives, they have better relationships with the significant others, their children and the other important people in their lives so there is less drama to deal with in the workplace.

4. Choice Theory is compatible with creating a spirit-driven culture in the workplace. Having an identified corporate culture helps you maintain a competitive edge by getting the right people on your “company bus” and keeping them there.

5. Choice Theory can actually provide you with a vehicle for getting the wrong people off your corporate bus. You know how you have some employees that simply aren’t the correct fit for your organization. Well, Choice Theory can provide you with a model that will help others evaluate if your environment is where they really want to work and you can rid yourself of those who truly are not contributing to the overall mission and vision of your company.

6. Having the right people in the right place at work leads to increased employee retention.

7. When you implement Choice Theory in your workplace, employees display more cooperation and less resistance. Their needs are being met at work and they understand the usefulness of what they are being asked to do.

8. Using Choice Theory at work, helps to eliminate the fear factor. There is less of an “us” versus “them” mentality and more of a “we” atmosphere. Once fear is reduced, people will speak up and problems truly can be viewed as opportunities for change and growth.

9. Using Choice Theory requires people to evaluate the quality of their own work, increasing personal ownership for the value of the goods or services produced.

10. And finally, teaching choice theory to employees with attract the people you want to your business. Not only with the “right” employees show up but you will attract the customers you want, as well. Outside vendors will want some of what you have.

Don’t wait. Get started today. Choice Theory workshops and personal and/or group coaching will make the difference in your company, giving you the competitive edge you want.

Imagine for a moment that it’s Monday. The alarm clock rings at six. It’s like a thunderclap cutting through the haze of yesterday’s white whine and three hours worth of Friend’s rerun.

So you get up… and accidentally bang your knee on the bedpost. Dark murderous thoughts fire across your neurons as you amble to the bathroom where you stub your toe.

Bam. Suddenly everything and everyone is public enemy number one.

You snarl at the wife handing you eggs.

You froth at Junior offering you coffee.

And you kick the fat hairy walking sofa licking your hand.

The rest of the day obviously spiralled for the worst- in fact you almost get fired for biting off the boss’ head.

That’s the Law of Attraction working against you. What you think and feel attracts the same. The Law of Attraction is simply the manifestation of your mind in the real world.

Let’s do a little experiment.

Hold out your arms and ask a friend to push it down as you think of something great- like when you snagged a promotion or enjoyed a night of steamy sex. He’d have difficulty pushing.

Now repeat the same while thinking about debts, bills, war or your in-laws.

He should push it down very easily. What gives?

Your mind transforms your body. Simple as that. What you think and feel empowers or weakens you.

Do you want to go around the world lugging a bunch of energy-sapping emotions? Or do you want to dominate your environment?

Here are five amazing tips I’ve implemented to explode the power of attraction in my life:

1) Always ask yourself “What Great Things Can I accomplish today” upon getting up. This sets the tone of your day and primes you attract positive opportunities.

2) Always be grateful for the things you took for granted. Like simply that you’re breathing. Say “Thank you, Im still breathing! Im luckier than that bloke under the tombstone.” Gratitude naturally and easily conditions you for affuence and attracts more empowered men and women into your life.

3) Something bad happen? Shrug it off and flick it from your jacket like lint. This action rapidly kicks any negative thoughts that may attract bad things into your day.

4) Hang out only with positive people. Like attracts like. Remember that.

5) And finally… treat people the way the expect to be treated. They will reciprocate and hold you in high regard. Build your social network on the right foot and expect to fly to the top of your aspirations. Attract the right people, support them and they will attract for you the right conditions for success!

Developing a business requires a strategy. You must be clear about your methods and objectives to be able to quantify your goals. Aside from the capital required, business development will predominantly depend on how you manage your people as well as your resources.

To be successful in your business development, you should first be aware of some of the most important qualities that you should possess as an owner or manager. Here are some of these qualities.

Patience

A successful business does not happen overnight. It would take years to polish your product and also hire employees who would want to stay for the long-term as much as you want them to be a part of the company. Along the way, there will be a lot of mistakes and your patience will be stretched to the limit. It is also normal that you will feel very frustrated with some of your employees’ performance and you should try very hard to train and motivate them. In addition to patience, you should also try to stay calm and composed especially when making crucial decisions.

Open-Mindedness

Being open minded is very important. You can achieve this by accepting that not all things can be in your control. If you continue believing that they are, you will end up frustrated. Set realistic targets and provide allowances for revisions, delays and errors. In addition to this, you should also be receptive to suggestions which could improve your business output. By being open to changes, you are allowing your business to adapt easily. This is actually one of the keys to long-term business success.

Motivated

When establishing or developing a business, make sure you are dedicated and commitment. During difficult times, you may be easily frustrated and feel like giving up. You should understand that as your business grows, it becomes more complicated. Just like bringing up a child, developing a business requires constant attention, which could be tiring. During setbacks or failures, you may even feel depressed. If you need to get motivated in an instant, you could try hypnotherapy to alter your behavior. Your subconscious is said to be more receptive to changes especially if you are under hypnosis.

You must remember that business development is a serious matter and the fact the many people depend on you should be enough to make you dedicated and committed. In the end, you are the first one who will enjoy the fruits of your labor.

The physical symptoms of anxiety and stress can be quite detrimental to one’s health. Unfortunately, many people may be so stressed that they do not realize the extent of it or the impact the stress and anxiety is having on their health. In some cases, the more stress or anxiety an individual experiences the less able they are to recognize it. Quite frequently in these situations the individual may have even become so accustomed to their level of stress, and the physical symptoms it produces, that they feel it is normal. Due to the fact that some people may not be aware of their emotional response to stress and anxiety they may need to rely on physical manifestations to identify it. This makes taking the time to learn about the physical symptoms of stress and anxiety an important step. Tuning into the symptoms of stress and anxiety can help you to identify potential triggers in your life and in turn help you to better manage them and alleviate the stress and anxiety in your life.

It is important to be aware that the physical symptoms of anxiety and stress can vary from one person to the next. Some symptoms may be more serious than others and can even be life threatening. It should be noted that one symptom on its own may not necessarily indicate the presence of stress or anxiety; however, where there are multiple symptoms this is a strong indication there is stress or anxiety present. Some symptoms you experience may be short-term while others may be long-term symptoms. Short-term symptoms include the following:

• Cold hands and feet

• Dry mouth

• Rapid breathing

• Increased heart beat

• Increased sweating

• Nausea

• Diarrhea

Generally these short term side effects appear when the body is responding to a perceived threat. This is the body’s way of helping you prepare to either stay and fight the threatening situation or flee from it; a response commonly known as fight or flight. While this rush of adrenaline and emotions can be helpful in a truly threatening situation, it can have negative impacts during times when there is no immediate danger.

Over time these physical symptoms can damage your self-confidence, disrupt the quality of your life and reduce the pleasure you get from your work. In addition, when the body is exposed to these physical symptoms over a long period of time your health can actually start to decline. Long term side effects of stress and anxiety include:

• Sexual disorders

• Changes in appetite

• Insomnia

• Frequent illness

• Back pain

• Asthma

• Headaches

• Digestive problems

• Lethargy

• Restlessness

• Depression

• Irritability

Remember, that one symptom by itself may not necessarily indicate the presence of either short term or long term stress and anxiety. There are other reasons that can result in a single symptom, such as certain medications. The presence of multiple symptoms; however, can indicate a problem. If you notice multiple physical symptoms of anxiety and stress, take heart in knowing that stress and anxiety management techniques can help you to reduce those symptoms and get back to your old self.

Having a strong, clear vision is the cornerstone of coaching success &ndash both for coaches and their clients. A great coach must not only have a strong vision of their own; they must also be able to help their client or “PBC” (Person Being Coached) developing theirs.

The best visions are clear, useful, achievable and inseparable from who and what you (or your clients) are. As a coach, if you can master the skill of helping to create clear and authentic visions in yourself and others, you’ll be light years ahead of your competition. . It helps both you and your clients with the foundation upon which they can build a successful and satisfying life &ndash both personally and professionally.

FIRST, WORK ON YOUR OWN VISION

Without a clear vision of what you want to do, where you want to go, or what you, success will be much more difficult &ndash even impossible &ndash to achieve.. How can you know what to do &ndash what actions to take - if you don’t know where you’re going?

Not having a vision is like sailing without a destination. You end up on the Sea of Destiny without a port, wandering the ocean aimlessly, getting blown in whatever direction the wind is headed. When a challenging storm bears down, the gale-force winds will likely capsize your latest plans immediately. You’ll end up looking like you were aboard the Ship of Fools.

Having a clear vision and mission is what gives you that destination. Even though gale-force challenges may temporarily capsize your progress, you’ll more easily be able to get back on course and reach your objectives.

Contrary to what many people think, visions do not usually magically appear. They can take time - requiring introspection, self-analysis, and journaling. It also helps to review your past successes and &ndash just as important &ndash your past disappointments and failures. Draw on your dream, talents and desire. Observe your calling to be a coach.

The first place to look when developing your vision is within &ndash to that deeper inner self. You can draw upon your talent, dreams and desires, or whatever other avenues help you uncover those nuggets that will become your navigational beacons in life.

Unfortunately, there are usually no shortcuts in creating your vision. You can’t just “make it up”; it takes WORK. But the rewards for doing this work can save you years &ndash even a lifetime &ndash of frustration by enabling you and your clients to live the life one is destined for.

SEVEN IDEAS TO HELP DEVELOP YOUR VISION

Idea 1: Listen and Look Within

Since vision starts within, it makes sense to listen and feel what your mind and soul really want. What stirs your heart? What is your greatest desire? What do you dream about?

Bottom line: Make sure your vision comes from within. If what you want to pursue does not truly come your inner depths, it will likely be impossible to achieve.

Idea 2: Seek the Help of Others; Make It a Team Sport

We do not live in a bubble. Utilize a team where you can. Heed the advice of a person who has more experiences in you &ndash especially in coaching. Find a coach who works on vision. Seek help from friends who know you well. They can help you confirm or question your own observations and provide a reality check.

Creating a MasterMind Group of 4-6 people also working on their vision can be extremely powerful. Use weekly or semi-weekly calls to support each other and keep the momentum going.

Asking and using others for guidance not only helps you with your own vision; it also puts you on the receiving end of help. This experience will in turn help you when you become the coach helping others with their vision. You’ll have done the proverbial “walk in their shoes”.

Idea #2: Create a Sacred, Inner Space to Go Deeper

The vision you create for your practice begins in your mind and heart. It is something you can feel, taste, see, hear and touch with your soul.

Creating a supportive, inner environment is a powerful way to aid you in developing your vision. To access the inner depths of your mind and heart, find a way to retreat to a serene and tranquil place where your mind is free of the “outer noise”.

In this sacred space, your heart, mind, and soul can more easily access what might be called Source. What you can find there is your most Authentic Self. Tap into this successfully, and your vision is likely to spring forth easily.

Though your mind may resist with every fiber of its being, try surrender into this emptiness. Check your brain out at the door. A Zen master once said, “You already are that which you seek.” But you’ll find it much easier to uncover that if you are relaxed and can get your mind out of the way.

Step 3: Ask (the Right) Questions

Ask the questions that provoke and encourage answers to the deeper questions. These might include:

• What is the single most important thing my practice needs to go to the next level and further help my customers best?

• What are the three most important actions I need to take in order to increase my sales or income?

• What are the three most important changes I need to make in order to help me and/or my clients accomplish my/their objectives?

• What is the single biggest challenge that &ndash if resolved &ndash would most help me or my clients.

Idea 5: Identity the Problems Holding You Back

Sometimes we’re just plain stuck. What about you? Where are your points of “stuck-ed-ness”? Discussing it with others &ndash especially your coach and MasterMind team &ndash is a powerful way to uncover the detours around or through the roadblocks holding you back from developing your vision.

There are times when we must first clear the rocks off the trail before we can continue on our path of self-discovery. Moving these out of the way helps unblock the energy flow, enabling us to more easily tap into the Source for answers.

Idea 7: Take Action and “Go For It!”

Nothing happens without action. Once you have come up with a Vision that seems to fit well, ACT ON IT. It might not be perfect, but if it’s “good enough”, then get going! You can always “course correct”.

Don’t get bogged down in thinking about HOW you’re going to get there. Momentum is a powerful force, perhaps THE most important force when you’re first embarking for your Vision.

A sailor on a long voyage can never know for sure the exact course they will take to their destination. He/she will need to constantly make corrections for winds, current, and unforeseen challenges along the route. In the same way, you can tweak and adapt your own journey.

Idea 6: K.I.S.S. (Keep It Short & Simple)

Once you have a pretty good idea of your vision, simplify it. Keep honing it down and find ways to bring more clarity. Be brutal; in fact go for what is sometimes call “brutal clarity of purpose”.

There is a nice analogy between a vision and a powerful photo. A very successful studio photographer was asked how he consistently came up with powerful photos. He responded, “Once I’ve got all the elements in the photo that I think I need, I start taking away from it. If I remove or simplify an element or item and it helps, I keep the change. I continue this process with everything I can until it hurts the overall image. That’s when I know I’ve got my image.”

The lesson: try simplifying or removing extraneous parts of your vision. Ask yourself, “Does it help &ndash or hinder? If it helps, keep the change. If it doesn’t, put it back. Continue with this process until you have the best picture you can.

CONCLUSION

Developing a Vision and acting on it is one of the most essential steps to creating a successful coaching practice. It is also one of the most powerful services you can offer your clients in helping them manifest their fullest potential.

Try these 7 ideas to help you do this. If something works for you, use it! If it doesn’t, discard it. We all have our own best ways of finding and developing our Vision. What matters most is that you do it, then act on it.

As we are reading a book we are often tempted to skip ahead to find out what happens next. It’s much like watching a movie and wanting to fast forward to the scene where the mystery is solved. It’s human nature to be impatient sometimes and although this might not sit well if you’re telling someone the ending of a movie they have yet to see, it does work well when it comes to speed reading.

One of the most important aspects of speed reading is retaining the information. It may seem as though you would automatically soak up whatever it is you are reading, but when you are reading at an accelerated rate, this isn’t always the case. There is an approach to speed reading that will help you take as much away from the material as you can.

When we begin reading a book we are usually paying extra close attention. We read each word in order to set the stage for the information that will follow. The same idea works with speed reading. As you read the first chapter carefully you are implanting the main ideas of the book in your mind. This sets the stage for the middle of the book, which you can now read quickly because you will have a strong understanding of the material including the characters and the setting. If you skim quickly through the first chapter you may lose some of the most pertinent information, the story may become lost and you won’t enjoy the book as much as you could have.

For some speed readers they find assistance in reading the final chapter of the book before they read the middle. In a work of fiction this approach wouldn’t work as well, but with a non-fiction book it certainly has its advantages. When you are reading a non-fiction book and you read the first and last chapters carefully before you immerse yourself in the rest of the book, you have a strong sense of the information that the book will contain. If you are speed reading the book, that knowledge will be priceless.

Speed reading doesn’t just involve how fast your eyes can move along the page. It also includes how you comprehend the information in the book. No one wants to spend time reading a book, whether it’s at a normal pace or speed reading, only to forget what they read.

By paying extra close attention to certain parts of the book you can increase your ability to speed read and at the same time you will be improving your understanding of the contents and this will help you retain much more of the information than you would have otherwise.

Take extra time to read the beginning of a book can pay off at the end. Its benefits are obvious when you are speed reading, but it can also be extremely beneficial when you are reading a book at a regular pace.

If you’re looking for ways top stop blushing, you could spend a lifetime trying the next temporary solution, the latest green tinted make-up or some kind of foul home remedy that ends up gathering dust in the cupboard.

In reality, there is but a few genuine ways to stop blushing for good. In fact. the only way to stop blushing or at best to calm in down to a comfortable level of control is to reprogram our minds and subconscious thoughts.

Before we reach that stage, we first need to change our outlook on everyday things in life in order to truly stop the mental negativity that causes and triggers blushing in the first place.

I’d like to explain how we can understand how other people might perceive our blushing, simply by understanding how we would act if the tables were turned…

As a child, when we see something we are not familiar with such as a scary looking dog or a road with cars rushing past, we stare and retract from them.

As an adult, these reactions become less as we experience more. However, we still have this natural instinctive reaction to things we are not too familiar with.

So, when we see someone who blushes excessively or appears extremely shy, we tend to react just as we did as that young child - we stare and retract ourselves.

On the other hand, some people react in different ways such as laughter, criticising or questioning. These alternative reactions can be equally hard for those who suffer from shyness and blushing due to these reactions being the very cause of shyness and blushing in the first place.

Most of us however, take a little time to adjust to something new or less ordinary but, just as the child did, we become accustomed to such things in other people and move on.

So, knowing that by our very nature, other people’s reactions and thoughts are only temporary…

…it becomes easier to accept our initial shyness and blushing behaviours.

Once everyone else has moved on after becoming accustomed to your uniqueness, you should also move on with them.

It is impossible to venture throughout this wonderful world if you continue to let a pre-occupation about your skin tone or personality hold you back.

All it tales is a little paddle in the big wide world to make many people realize that life is not so much about themselves but about others. If we all became so obsessed with ourselves the world would be a boring place to live in.

Furthermore, it is vital to understand that friendships and respect are gained from listening, helping and involving yourself in others. People are attracted to others who show interest and provide benefits in their own lives.

So whether or not you are prone to blushing, you will always have the ability to be a great friend, have great friends and achieve whatever you desire with a little dedication and hard work.

So look outward in life, in order to feel better inward. Shift the focus of your personal problems to that of helping others with theirs, and you will soon notice the shyness and blushing fading away like an old painting.

Let’s face it: not many of us like getting up in the morning to face the long day of work ahead. However, every working person still does this for his or her own personal reasons. These reasons make up a theory of motivation for going to work.

Most people do not work merely for the fun of it. Chances are, there is an underlying reason or reasons that drive the person to put the effort forth. Some key reasons that motivate individuals to work are:

-Money

-Responsibility

-Social life

Show me the money:

In many cases, money certainly does make the world go around. Money is the number one reason in the theory of motivation that makes people want to work. Money earned on the job will pay bills, support a family or an individual, or be put towards a material goal. Parents may work to pay for their child’s upbringing and education. A high school student may work to pay for auto insurance and possibly his or her own car. A college student may work to pay for university courses and books. Money is a highly important factor when it comes to living comfortably.

In the workplace theory of motivation, company owners and bosses understand how important money is. For this reason, they may offer employees monetary rewards or benefits for a job well done. They understand that an employee who is happy will reap prosperity for their company.

Who’s the boss?

On-the-job responsibility is another element in the workplace theory of motivation. Most workers take great pride in their work and in the job that they perform. People become motivated by the responsibilities that their jobs can bring. For example, an assistant manager at a retail store may do his or her best to get as many sales as possible and to learn as much as possible about management of the store. This may be due to the fact that this person has the hope of one day becoming manager of the entire store. Responsibility, therefore, is also rated highly in the theory of motivation.

The workplace as a meeting place:

Some people are not concerned about salary or job advancement. Instead, they are interested in the social part of the workplace. Because of this, the desire for a social life is part of the theory of motivation in the workplace. Typically, wives who are the secondary providers in a household that does not require them to work, still take jobs because they find that staying at home is boring.

At work, they will meet friends to chat with, go out with after work hours, or simply to confide in and share experiences with. Many elderly people also take on careers for this reason. Many older people become bored with retirement or lonely staying home alone. They work in order to have a social life. Thus, a social life is also part of the theory of motivation in the workplace.

We all know life is full of choices. The most powerful choice you have to make is how you view your life.

Choice #1: Life happens, you react

Choice #2: You are the director of your life

The wonderful thing is that there is no “wrong” choice. Since it’s your life, you decide which is best for you. However, each option produces extremely different results. Perhaps the best approach is not to choose which option you like, but choose the option that has the end result you believe is best for you.

End Result of Life Choice #1 &ndash Unknown

It’s impossible to determine the outcome here. Why? Because you’re letting everyone and everything else determine your life’s outcome. The one constant is that you will spend your life reacting to events around you.

But beware: many who choose this road end up considering themselves a victim of life. It’s easy to spot a Life Choice #1 individual &ndash they are full of excuses and are quick to blame others. Like why they’re late every day to work (“traffic is horrible”), why they have no job (“nobody will hire me”), why they don’t have supportive relationships (“my parents didn’t teach me who to look for”), and in general, why they just can’t seem to get ahead.

End Result of Life Choice #2 &ndash Known

The outcome here is much better defined because you are in charge. Essentially, your life is a movie, full of main characters, supporting casts, dramatic events, and even a few twists in the plot. The exciting part about Life Choice #2 is that you are also the director in your own life. What do directors do? Edit. Review. Revise. Add comedy, love, action &ndash whatever it is that makes the movie best.

It’s easy to spot a person who’s chosen Life Choice #2 - you take responsibility for your actions and accept the consequences, both negative and positive. The end result is that your life is yours.

Who’s Your Life Director?

You…or everyone else? (Remember that not making a choice is not an option &ndash it’s a passive way of picking Life Choice #1 - letting life happen.)

Now is the time to actively take control of your life. What path do you choose?

Positive self-talk means purposely giving yourself positive reinforcement, motivation, and recognition- just as you would do for a friend. Congratulate yourself when you do well, and remind yourself of your abilities, accomplishments, strengths and skills. Keep a to-do list, check off accomplishments, and review your progress periodically.

Make self-talk work for you. When you habitually say to yourself has a very profound impact on your self-image, your self-esteem, and your performance as well as eventual success. Remember that your subconscious triggers physiological responses to match the pictures and thoughts that you have of yourself to make them happens. Make this work for you by keeping your self-talk positive.

For example say to yourself either “ I did a good job on that changing a friend’s oil even though I took a quart and